What’s The Most Important Thing Someone Has Said To You?
What did it teach you?
After a busy morning, I was cuddled up under multiple blankets scrolling through Quora.com (always an interesting experience). I was looking at various writing prompts to get a bit of inspiration, and then I stumbled upon a specific thread, posing one question. “What is the most important thing someone has ever said to you?” Though it’s a relatively open question, the thread grew to over 100 comments.
Some answers were more heartfelt than others, and some had me cracking up laughing. After reading so many different responses, it got me thinking… what’s the most important thing I’ve ever been told? According to Proedit.com, the average human being uses about 860,341,500 words in one lifetime. Naturally, being about 20% into what I assume will be my lifetime, I’ve got a decent amount of words and conversations to choose from. I’m a talker, so it’s quite hard to decide on what interactions with others impacted me the most.
Interestingly enough, a lot of the more important interactions I’ve experienced were conversations with the older generations. Working at a nursing home was essentially one year of endless advice, and I’ve taken a lot of it with me. One of my favorite rooms to visit was the room of an older married couple. No matter what they were up to, it seemed as if they always had time to let someone sit down and talk to them. I worked in activities, and every time I’d come to drop off some puzzles, they’d offer me some snacks and want to tell me stories of their past together.
Be Adaptable-
Once, the husband was at a doctor’s appointment and the wife was scared to death. I was sitting and talking with her, and all the sudden, she went on a bit of a rant about how much she adored her husband. She began telling me about how she met him, and when she knew she loved him. The one thing that stuck with me was when she said: “It’s okay to fall in love with the same person a bunch of times, and it’s okay to have to work hard to love them. All that matters is that you do love them, that’s all you need.”
I think this stuck with me because I realized how much people can change over the years, and how a good relationship with anyone depends on being able to adapt and grow. You won’t stay the same your whole life, so you can’t expect those around you to, either. You must be understanding, and be supportive to the changes that can occur. This doesn’t only matter in relationships, it matters in nearly every aspect of life. Being open to the idea of change can open up a sea of different opportunities, whether it relate to work, school, or friendships.
Be Fearless-
Being someone who overthinks quite a lot, my parents have always tried to encourage me to be less worried about the little parts of life. It’s been an uphill battle, and I’ve only really began to understand it this year. My father and I share a few hobbies, with our favorite being archery. We typically go to a range once or twice a week and shoot our bows together. Often times, the rides to and from the bow range were the little moments we shared between the two of us. My dad usually took this time to catch up with me, and give me whatever advice he had on his mind. A few months ago, he brought up the anxiety I often feel while driving.
I’ve been learning to drive, and for the first six months of holding my learner’s permit — I was terrified. I would practically white-knuckle the steering wheel, and my heart-rate seemed to skyrocket every time I buckled myself in. After driving on one of the busier roads in my town, my dad mentioned how much I miss out on being so scared. He told me, “Ashlyn, you’re missing out on a lot of stuff being so worried. Fear can ruin everything. Fear can stop you from loving the person you love because you’re too scared to tell them. Fear can stop you from driving to places you’ve never been before because you’re too scared to go down the road. Fear can mess you up, don’t let it.”
In the simplest way possible, he was right. Fear isn’t something that we should let conquer our lives, because all it does is hold us back. Life is so much more beautiful when you can sit back and enjoy the blessings it gives. Living fearlessly and unapologetically is the goal, and I know it’s not the easiest place to reach. It’s worth the work, though, and if you find yourself terrified of a lot of things, I would recommend you attempt to get rid of the fear inside yourself. Life’s short, and it’s too valuable to waste on being anxious all the time. Find the things that help you calm down, and practice them often.
Be Unapologetic-
As the last important thing that has stuck with me, I have to talk about my mom’s advice. My mom and I are similar in more ways than I used to think, and we both come across as quite introverted and caring. As much as I’d like to say other’s opinions don’t impact me, sometimes they do. Anytime I’ve ever come to my mom about situations related to the opinions of others, she has always made sure to remind me that worrying about what others think is a losing battle that I’ll never win, because someone is always going to have some sort of opinion. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve genuinely realized that some people cannot be pleased, no matter what you do.
One Final Thought-
These three things have stuck out to me because they have all shaped how I view my own reactions to situations, and they’ve also helped me understand the actions of others. Life is hard to navigate, and sometimes the best way to learn about how to get through it is to talk to those who have already been through a larger majority of it. Advice is something I value greatly, and as an after-thought, I would encourage you all to sit back and think: “What is the most important thing someone has said to you?” Why is it so important to you? What have you learned from it?
